A is for Advent

December is a time of high expectations. I want the tree to look beautiful, centered on the front window so all the neighbors can see its light. I want the food to be delicious. I want awesome presents under the tree! I want my children to have great memories. (Not run-of-the-mill Christmas memories, but “core memories” — moments so potent and visceral that they will remember the magic when they’re old and gray and think back with fond gratitude toward their parents.) Is all of that even possible?

(Maybe, I guess, if you have a big enough budget, or the perfect house, or children better-behaved than mine.) But I live in reality, which means, for me, Christmas is confined by certain restraints. And perhaps that’s the first lesson of Advent: we want impossible things, and the impossible things we want have nothing to do with what we really need.

Whether you celebrate Christmas or not — whether you believe in God or not — we can all agree that life is harder than we want it to be. The shiniest toys, greatest successes, and best relationships can tarnish and crumble with time. I don’t know about you, but for me there’s always a let-down that happens after the holidays (or a great vacation), not only because it’s over, but also because all those beautifully wrapped presents (or beach-side margaritas) didn’t really move the needle on the deeper ache in my soul that just won’t go away.

In his book, The Weight of Glory, C.S. Lewis wrote “He who has God and everything else has no more than he who was God only.” Is that true? If I’m honest, most days I don’t live as if it is. Mostly, I live in pursuit of the “everything else.” But shiny things fade. Toys break. Relationships end. Thieves steal and destroy. Death visits our homes, and leaves us on our knees. No matter what I have, I will always want more.

Is there anything that can soothe this endless desire?

Advent says Yes.

Advent turns my attention from what I want to what I really need — not under the tree — but in my soul.

Advent turns my eyes toward Jesus and helps me to see that Jesus is not a story, or a concept or a myth. He is a real person, who came into the world at a particular moment in time, in a specific zip code, to two imperfect parents, within a context of political, cultural, and religious upheaval. I want “everything else,” but the radical story of Christmas is that Jesus wants me.

And He wants you too.

December is a perfect time to ask these “BHQ’s” — big hairy questions — about life and existence. What do I do with all this longing? Will the darkness ever give way to light? Is it possible we were made for more?

The A

nswer was born in Bethlehem.

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Recent Favorites

Listen — Be Ready When the Luck Comes, by Ina Garten. This memoir by the founder of the Barefoot Contessa, is so charming and inspiring. Ina and her husband Jeffery have lived a magical life — one marked by love, commitment, and the joy of hospitality. I’ve been listening to the audio book, which is narrated by Ina herself, and it is such a joy to hear her story. Highly recommend!

Watch — Empty Rooms. CBS Sunday morning produced this beautiful, heart-wrenching segment about the empty bedrooms of victims of school shootings. The segment is about 8 minutes, and hard to take in, but I commend it to you.

Watch — Shepherd Hotel, Clemson, SC — this CBS Nightly News piece focuses on the work of Shepherd Hotel in Clemson, SC, which hires and trains employees with different abilities. Talk about missional living! Try not to smile while you watch.

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One More Thing…

At a friends’ insistence (looking at you, Mary Kate Edwards) — I am going to be writing a Daily Advent devotional called “A is for Advent,” running from December 1st to December 26th. I will be using the alphabet as my prompt each day. To join the fun, send me an e-mail and I’ll include you in the e-mail each day. (Suggested donation $5 on Venmo, but truly all are welcome.) Whether you read the short reflection at the breakfast table, next to the Christmas tree, or at night before bed, I hope these daily readings will provide you and your family a simple place to start, cultivating a holy anticipation of Christ.